Monday, June 1, 2009

Trying Hard Not To Obsess!

Today we went in for a weight check for Bennett and they said if he gains then we won't need to see a doctor and if he doesn't gain then we will have to see the doctor. So Mr. Bennett gained 1 huge ounce (7.12 now up from 7.11- 7.14 was his birth weight.) So they had us wait to see the doctor. Typically they like to see a baby gain 1 ounce a day so I was expecting to see him weigh around 8 lbs now but since Bennett has a heart defect and DS they are not expecting that with him, I wish they would've told me that before! The doctor was not concerned with his weight and thinks he looks great and said by listening to his heart she wouldn't know that he had a heart defect- this is the first time this doctor has seen Bennett.

I asked her if she felt I needed to start supplementing with higher calorie formula or wake him from his nice 5 hour stretch at night and to my surprise she said for now, no. She really felt like he was okay. So why am I starting to stress just a tad? Well, he's beginning to become an even sleepier eater and anyone that has nursed before knows how frustrating this can be! I feel like it is my sole duty to put weight on this baby before his surgery but how can I if he just wants to sleep!?? Today he has been his sleepiest as far as feeding goes and Mike thinks it's because we were at the doctor and she poked and prodded at him but now I just don't want him to lose weight. (Sorry if you are getting this twice through email- I accidentally pushed publish)

I told her I have a baby scale- yes, I have one because I became an obsessive mom with Ainsley and her weight. If you've ever had a baby in the NICU for an extended amount of time and weight and feeding have been an issue, you know where I'm coming from. So she said that if I wanted to, I could weigh him- but just once a week- not every day- I will try my hardest not to weigh him every day because honestly I don't want to obsess over this I just feel like I'm doing everything I can before having to turn to a bottle and I want him to nurse because I read it helps with speech later on (works on the muscles around the mouth more). I just don't want to give in yet but I want him to gain weight!! I think I'll give it another week and see how he is doing. Otherwise he has plenty of wet diapers and seems perfectly content-if he only knew how he was driving his mommy crazy with his sleepy feeds!!

19 comments:

  1. Kira was a sleepy eater for awhile, too. We had a hard road getting started with breastfeeding, but we persevered and I breastfed her for 25 months.

    When she was Bennett's size, I would feed her as long as she would eat - then I'd pump while Derek would work at feeding her from a bottle of milk that I'd pumped the previous feeding. He'd talk to her, wiggle her gently, rub her tummy, all kinds of stuff to keep her awake and eating a little bit more. We did this until she was about 6 weeks or so - after that, she exclusively breastfed and acted like she had never seen a bottle in her life.

    We supplemented with formula the first couple of weeks - mainly because she was in the hospital her first five days and I was back and forth.

    If the Dr said don't worry, I wouldn't worry. You're doing great Mama!

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  2. I am so happy to hear that Bennett continues to do well. As with your concerns about him gaining weight...it gets easier, I promise. For the first three months, I was *obsessed* with Lucy's eating schedule, daily intake, weight, etc. When she started sleeping through the night at five weeks, I asked the doc if I should wake her to eat. He told me I was out of my mind! No one could have convinced me not to worry about it, so I won't try to convince you. I will just tell you that as he continues to thrive and get all chubby, you will find yourself less and less occupied with his weight. In the meantime, good luck and keep up the good work!

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  3. Oh my gosh, don't worry for at least a week. Even though he only gained an ounce, he didn't lose any weight, which is great. I remember that my kids looked the most yellow (jaundice) at about a week old, and that makes them super sleepy (if you notice he's a little jaundiced, you can put him by a window for extra sunlight each day). I am not a doctor, but I nursed all five of my kids. If your doctor is not concerned, your goal should be to nurse him as frequently as you can. All the usual tricks--undressing him, changing him before he eats, tickling his toes--should help. Plenty of wet diapers is a great sign. You are both doing great...try not to worry!

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  4. Who cares if you obsess...you're a mom and that's what we do!! LOL! Just thought I would let you know that Lily's cardiologist wanted Lily to gain about 4 ounces a week or a pound a month. Lily was able to do this with fortified formula...27 calories an ounce instead of 20.

    Sounds like things are going great! Wow...5 hours of sleep at a stretch is awesome.

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  5. Payton was exactly the same way, and she did not have a major heart defect. Hang in there ... he will get much better as the weeks go on.

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  6. I think it's great that you're committed to nursing, and I completely understand about the weight gain issue. My daughter was sleepy too, and we had to strip her down naked to wake her up (nothing like a cold wipe to wake up quickly) so she'd nurse. I found that if I kept her on one side she'd nurse better--getting the richer hind milk, then use the other side on the next feeding time.

    Give Bennett a chance to show you what he can do! And try not to worry about his weight. Pump when you can, to keep your supply up. Please don't be tempted to use a bottle that makes it easier for him to get milk--this can lead to all kinds of problems (especially ear infections=hearing issues). If possible, try to keep his ears higher than his mouth when he's nursing. This will keep milk from pooling in his eustacian tubes (a big problem with cross cut bottle nipples).

    You are doing a great job being proactive! It's hard not to worry, but you know how quickly babies change their patterns when they are new--he'll soon be gulping down the milk like a champ!

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  7. I was just introduced to your blog through "Pinwheels". Your site is wonderful! I look forward to reading it and watching Bennett grow up. He is absolutely precious! My daughter turns 3 this weekend, and like your son, has been more of a blessing to my life than anyone could imagine. I wouldn't change a thing -- she's perfect. Congratulations to you and your family!

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  8. I obsessed and did wake Lindsey at night. I couldn't help it. She was slow to gain for about the first 2 months and now is a chunky 14 lbs 10 oz cutie. We are moms that is just what we do. She was also jaundiced and on a bili blanket for about 4 days after coming home from the hospital so she was extra sleepy.
    We would strip her down to the diaper, play around with her feet, change her diaper half way through, and positions that had the least amount of skin to skin. I ended up pumping for her. You are doing great, keep with it.

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  9. I'm totally obsessed with Anna's weight too and I'm renting a hospital scale right now and I weigh her once a day and then before and after bf'ing too...she has plateaued for almost 3 weeks (partly due to one of her new heart meds) but it's totally stressing me out! My docs kind of freak out about her lack of weight gain too, which doesn't help matters! Good luck, I hope he pudges up!

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  10. Sam was only 3lbs 15 oz when he was born and the Dr. sent us home when he was 3lbs 11oz. He was soooo tiny. I was a first time Mom and really didn't know any different and didn't stress to much and I'm glad I didn't because he is a little chunk now and is only 10 months. I breast fed for only 6 weeks and he just didn't do very well nor did I but he didn't really drink much from a bottle either and he still gained. So, try not to worry to much. You are doing great!!

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  11. Eianwas very sleepy at first.e had to wake him to eat. Then he still wouldn't take but part of the bottle. It all chaned soon he started becomig aware of the world and turned into a pig. At 20 months ol he's finaly up to 25lbs.

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  12. Congratulations! He is so adorable! I wanted to let you know that when I was having a hard time breast feeding my daughter I looked into other ways to supplement since she would get frustrated. I really did not want to go to the bottle and wanted her to get as much breast milk as possible. I ran across a lactation aid. It is basically a soft thin tube attached to a bottle or bag that has the supplement in it (formula or expressed breast milk). Bennett would still latch onto your breast and still nurse but also receive the supplement through the tube as you slid it into his latch or it can be taped to your breast. Hopefully this is helpful. Again, Bennett is absolutely adorable! Congratulations! Keeping you all in my prayers.
    Tanya

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  13. Adrienne,

    Don't fret my dear. It took JEB FOREVER to get to 10 lbs! He weighed 5' 14" when he was born and two weeks later, when he was released from NICU, he weighed 5' 11". Pretty much he gained but rather slowly. In fact he was born in JUNE and was still wearing 3-6 months cloths in December at Christmas time....then he fell in line with the size at that age. At nine months, he was wearing 6-9 month sizes....and so one. He's just this past year started putting on weight.....he's 9 next week and weighs 67 lbs. which is quite below the norm. He's also grown quite tall, but considerably smaller than others that are turning 9 yrs. old.

    SO, I say all of that to say, don't worry. As long as he's gaining, your good. His progress may be slower than you saw with the girls, but its ok. I'll be praying for you as you go thru all of this. I know for me, I didn't have any other point of reference since he's was our first baby, but really, keep feeding and he'll grow. I'm certain of it.

    Later,
    deb

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  14. I haven't checked in for a while... and look, He is here! What a cutie!! My Sydney was in the NICU two weeks due to pulmonary hypertention and learned to drink from a bottle, so nursing was tough. I pumped and pumped and pumped. It took using a Gerber Nurser to help transition her to breastfeeding. She had a tough go for a while, but we persevered and she made it to full nursing. She weaned at 18 months, so obviously finally figured it out.

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  15. BOTH my boys took a long time to gain back their birthweight, and they were both very sleepy eaters. I would wake them every three hours during the day and force them to stay awake to eat. At night I would let them go up to five but then I would wake them. My lactation consultant said that until they're about ten pounds, they aren't necessarily able to regulate themselves to wake up when they're hungry. But you're doing great with Bennett and I'm sure he's fine! I never bought a baby scale but I rented one several times and was always going to the hospital to see my LC. Ultimately, I just really stressed myself out! I'm sure he's doing fine...and if you have to supplement, he'll do just fine as well. :)

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  16. My daughter had a similiar problem with weight gain. Have you had an OT observe him while he is feeding? For me, after weeks and weeks of barely any gain and being told "she's fine" after on OT observed her, within minutes she diagnosed a suck swallow coordination problem and noted that she was tiring out too quickly. With a few simple changes in how I positioned a finger under her chin and also pulled out every 10 to 15 seconds giving her time to stop and breath, she started to thrive and gain weight. Hope this helps! By the way, he absolutely precious!

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  17. Ugh, Samantha was a sleepy eater, too, and nursing her was sooooooo frustrating! I totally understand the obsession, too--we nearly went out and bought a baby scale, but he'll get there, you'll see! And just wait until Dr. Spray gets hold of him! :-) The man is fabulous.

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  18. Adrienne,
    I went thru this with Tarenne too. She did not really nurse until she was 14 weeks old because she was SO sleepy. This too shall pass, just keep reminding yourself of that. One day he'll be a chubby little toddler and you'll laugh that you ever worried about this. :-) His surgery will come in God's timing. I'll be praying!

    Your family is gorgeous!

    Congrats and HUGS HUGS HUGS!

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  19. He knows what he is doing!. Bennett knows he needs to rest and sleep as much as possible so his little heart doesn't have to do too much work and his lungs can do their job without any problems. :)
    Adrianne, remember you are never alone, you are in very good hands!. Trust that Bennett will always lead the way :)

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