First off, I usually don't blog this many times in one day but I've got a few things to blog about so here I go...
Well, if all goes as planned Bennett will be making his debut on Friday, May 22nd! My c-section is scheduled for 8:30 that morning. It has been approved and all necessary doctors and staff should be available for our little guy!
Now, onto some really cool news- at least I think it's cool. So they call me back for my appointment today and the ultrasound lady is the one taking me back-I'm thinking, I'm not supposed to get an ultrasound today but okay. She asks if it's okay if she looks at the baby's heart because she has a student with her and they got a new level II ultrasound machine (same one as the specialists have) and she'd like to point some things out to her student. So I said sure, I love seeing little Bennett, we'll see him again tomorrow morning but if it will help someone in training, why not? (Just so you know, he still has a heart defect, that's not the neat news)
So we're in there and they are looking at the heart and discussing it and we start talking about the baby and Down syndrome and measurements and then she says "You know Dr. So and So has a son with Down syndrome"? (Dr. So and So is the doctor that I have seen more than the other doctors in the practice for what ever reason but ever since we found out about Bennett he has been very sensitive and nice so I've been considering him for the c-section. My friend Renee recommended him and has always said he was nice so I just assumed this is how he was and I liked him as well) So I said " Umm, nooo, he does??!!" I knew he had 4 boys because he mentioned it one time when Harper was having a complete meltdown while he was trying to talk to me and he said he understood, he had 4 boys. But he has never given me any reason to believe he has a child with DS. How crazy is that?? So I said to the tech, he's never mentioned it and she was surprised but said maybe he's just private about his family.
So I'm waiting for him to come in and I'm thinking should I say something? When he comes in he still does not give me any clues that he knows how I might feel or that he understands or that hey, I have a child with DS too, although he's very nice of course but if the tech didn't tell me today, I still would not have known! So I said nothing. As he was going over the date for the c-section he said Dr. Pelini would be the one doing the c-section and I'm thinking: wait, I want you to do it! He then says he will be off that day but he may come in to help with the c-section. I'm like, okay, why on earth would you do that but wow and great!
Then I go to meet with the nurse who schedules the c-sections and I ask her about Dr. So and So's son and she confirms it as well. I asked her why he wouldn't say anything and she said he is a private man and doesn't really talk about any of his sons. I said well do you know if his son with DS is doing okay and how old he is? She said she's seen plenty of pictures in his office and he's adorable, he's about 11 now and he is their third son, they had no idea he had DS until he was born. She then said, "You know he is offering to come in on his day off to help deliver your son?" I said "Yes I know, that's very kind and he doesn't have to do that but I would love it if he was there." How sweet is that??
I mean, how crazy is this?? For some reason I feel so much better about everything, just knowing one of my own doctors has this in common with us is really neat. What are the chances of that? I just wish he would say something! So what do you think, should I bring it up to him?? I see him in two weeks. Should I say something like, I have a personal question and you don't have to answer this but I've heard you have a son with DS, how is he??? Do you think it's strange he hasn't said anything? Do you think it's crossing the privacy line for him if he did? Obviously the nurses didn't' think it was that private. The c-section nurse said she thinks I should ask him about it next time. But I'm telling you, he is not giving me any signs that he would have a son with DS other than just being nice and offering to come in on his day off to help with my surgery! I still can't believe it. Never in a million years would I have thought my doctor had a son with DS. Too ironic!
Now I'm feeling bad because I mentioned to him today that I want everyone (doctor's and staff) aware at Bennett's birth that we know about his diagnosis and I don't want it to be awkward or sad and that I've talked with some moms about their birth experience (they did not know about the baby having DS) and how the staff treated them. As soon as I said that I thought, oh crap, I bet he and his wife didn't know (which of course now I do know that they didn't know) but I guess I just assumed he being a doctor would know?? But he didn't seem weird about it and said he would make sure that everyone was aware and didn't think it would be a problem. Oh, I wish I hadn't said that but it's too late now!